Invasion

24 and clueless.

Still.

Why has the concerns from the teens not left yet? Has it invaded and conquered the 20s? Am I simply succumbing to these woes?

Violence has never been the answer. It frays the body, puts a hole in my mind. I exist only to display this disgusting play brought to you by anxiety and fear. Insecurities. So many characters occupy this miserable story. There is no place for what I thought was my essence.

I am a spectator of my own story.

Is this how I’m going to teach myself a lesson?

To the light and back

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Patan Museum is lovely this time of the year.

Especially today. It rained a bit in the noon and left the city feeling cleaner than it had in weeks.

The April 2015 earthquake did a considerable damage to old structures in the Museum and the Durbar Square. But quick action from the Museum authorities made it possible to retrieve valuable pieces. Ones like in the picture.

These struts (bilampau) are currently waiting to be restored, and are not really in exhibit. They were stored in a small dark room, an entryway to a courtyard. But I thought they were beautiful. Quietly waiting for their turn at glory. Resilient.

A lost sailor

Your memories Echo in my head everyday
Your words create whirlpools.
My ocean of freedom shrinks into a river,
reduced to a stream,
then a pond –
You make me go back in ways I never imagined.

I’m a lost sailor
Only way back is the place from where I set off,
But I can’t take it anymore, this boat has to sink,
And I dive with little idea about swimming in the deep dark
(A memory of you telling me how illogical I was)
I’m in unfamiliar waters.

But I persist until I either die trying
Or until I learn the most valuable lesson of my short life.

Your Joke’s On Us

You joke, life feels bright
You joke, we laugh with all our might
You joke, now you almost cross the line
You joke, now anger on my sight
You joke, I feel like coming up to you with a knife
You joke, I feel like taking your life
You still joke with the knife on your neck
I laugh so much that I drop that knife
And fall on the floor, laughing
You resume joking, we get back on track,
Life could be bliss again.